Oh Jess. Jess. Jess. Jess. I know you need attention, so you express this need by wearing a see through knit dress to whatever the H she is attending. Honor, (her spawn), don't learn from mommy. If you ever want attention from her or Cash, act like a nice little midget person. Don't try and run around town naked just to make complete strangers happy.
So now I know how Kim Kardashian shapes her overly large rump: lots and lots of ice cream. I thought for a while that maybe it was genetics, or maybe an insane workout routine.. but no. It's ice cream. So girls, if you want to be famous and be super sexy, make sure to get through a pint of Ben & Jerry's a day. Quote me on that.
...Ok. This "The Office" rumor mill is getting a little ridiculous. There are actually rumors out there that HARVEY KEITEL might be a replacement for Steve Carrell.
Paul Lieberstein, who plays Toby on the show and serves as one of its executive producers, tells E! News that Keitel "is probably the only guy who can do it, and he's doing TV now ... That's what a very smart/eager man once called a 'win-win-win.'" (Keitel recently starred on ABC's "Life on Mars.")
"I haven't started any talks with his people, but Harvey would do a great job -- a very different energy," Lieberstein says. "And we don't want to bring in another Michael, having someone play a very similar character because we have such a high regard for Steve."
Carell has announced that the show's upcoming seventh season will be his last as branch manager Michael Scott, and Lieberstein insists he's serious about Keitel taking over.
"Yes, absolutely," he says. "He's a real tough guy, but I saw him in 'Life on Mars' and I saw a lot more comedy in his work, just little slivers of it, little things he would do that made me think he's capable of a lot more than what (he's done)."
"He's an old salesman who thought he could retire and the stock market went down, and he has to come out of retirement to work for a few years," Lieberstein explains.
Uhhhhhhhh. I'm not so sure how that's going to go down.
So maybe it's a good thing that Heidi Montag isn't releasing her sex tape... because I just realized how ugly she is. On the inside and outside. While exchanging puppies with her ex-husband Spencer Pratt, she wasn't wearing makeup. And you can DEFINITELY tell. How? Well, she looks like the Kraken.
HOLY CRAP. If this is what happens to girls after they get married, then sign me the eff up. It's ridiculous how much hotter Hilary appears to be now that she is married. Maybe it's because I know she is super unavailable (when she was just a regular unattainable celebrity before)... but she is REALLY making me want to put on my A-Game stalking.
If you were looking forward to a Heidi Montag sex tape, you're going to be very... very disappointed. The divorced couple has officially cut off negotiations with Vivid Entertainment and Steven Hirsch. They are "no longer interested" in selling the sex tape.
Sources close to the couple say that Spencer's rep shot a letter to Hirsch explaining, "Heidi's made it very clear that she is not interested in releasing any tapes" ... adding, "It looks like she pulled the kill switch."
The letter also explains, "Spencer's not interested in further destroying their relationship by pursuing an avenue she's so vehemently against."
DANGIT.
James Jay Lee, the gunman who took hostages today at the Discovery Channel headquarters in Maryland, died after being shot by the police.
Lee unsuccessfully spoke with several negotiators during the standoff, his backpack explosion detonated, and the rest is history. For James anyway.
Cops say tactical officers managed to get close to Lee, who then saw him point a handgun at one of the hostages. That's when officers decided to open fire.
Law enforcement claims Lee made several demands that "mirrored" the demands he had made on his radical website.
