According to fellow comics and Boston radio personalities, Dane Cook has been named "The Unfunniest Comic"! How great is that!? Specifically, The New York Post's Page Six reports:
WBCN jock Fred Toucher, who co-hosts a talk show with Rich Shertenlieb weekday afternoons in Boston, says Cook is the overwhelming favorite in a tournament patterned after NCAA basketball's March Madness, where he's ahead of Jay Leno, Jeff Foxworthy, Carlos Mencia and Paula Poundstone.
"We were talking about how people laugh out loud at nonsense and Dane is a good example of that," Toucher told Page Six. "We'd listen to him and at the end of four minutes he'd change subjects, and that was it. We couldn't figure out when the joke was.
"And he's actually hated. People don't hate others they way they do him. At least Foxworthy panders to rednecks. Dane's stories are so weak you wouldn't want to hear them over lunch.""
HA! GOOD! I hate Dane Cook and I think it's great that other people hate him too! Not to mention, this "Unfunniest Comic" competition was based in Boston, his own home town! Wow, this is like a celebrity version of Survivor... only instead of getting kicked out because you suck at making fire out of twigs and friction, you're humiliated in your own hometown because you suck at the one thing you think you're good at! HAHAHA! Ahh, that's beautiful!
I don't know why, I keep thinking of what would happen if we all lived in a medieval village with Dane Cook hundreds of years ago and he was all dressed up in bright-colored tights and a Jester's hat trying to score a few laughs until the king realizes that there's only so many jokes involving both penises and cashews that a small medieval village can take... and thus excommunicates him from the village. Then, I just picture Dane slowly walking over this rickety bridge in his tights and into the woods, alone, to live a life of medieval solitude.
Yea, I don't know what the hell any of that was. Disregard all of it. It's sad and embarassing to admit that I actually had those thoughts. But hey, at least it was all real and I was completely honest with you. At the very least, I hope you leave here thinking to yourself... "Wow, Ace is one weird human... but you gotta admit, he's one REAL dude." You gotta at least give me that!
