As everyone knows, Angelina Jolie gave birth to twins Vivienne and Knox a couple weeks ago. Now, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have asked Bono to be the godfather of the children. The couple is long-time friends with the U2 singer, and feels honored to have Bono in the extended family. Bono was “thrilled” as well by the agreement. It’s the feel good story of the year! The Mirror says:
"Angelina is inspired by Bono's humanitarian work and gets on with his wife Ali Hewson. Ali's given Angelina some clothes from her ethical clothing range Edun."
I don’t want to tarnish this special moment in the young Jolie children’s life, but I know what Brad and Angelina are up to. Bono has been working to improve Africa for years now, and change is starting to come around. Public interest is at an all-time high, and the continent is starting to show early signs of forthcoming cultural revolution. And Bono is just getting warmed up. By the time these kids reach adulthood, Africa is going to be a paradise, where everyone lives in a joyous harmony and the street are lined with solid gold.
Meanwhile, the American education system continues to regress. The value of the dollar is slipping to unfathomable lows. Gas prices are out of control and we can’t break our dependence on foreign oil. Violence is increasing as the U.S. continues to inspire hatred from other nations worldwide. Yes, we’re headed to hell in a poorly crafted American-made hand basket.
Give it 40-50 years, and everyone is going to want to move to Africa. Of course, at that time, Bono will have been elected Africa’s Ultimate & Supreme Leader, and he’ll have final decision on who gets to come and who doesn’t. By choosing Bono as godfather, Brad and Angelina are ensuring that Knox and Vivienne will one day have instant access to the solid gold mecca that is future Africa.
Either that, or they’re just hoping to get an acoustic performance of “One” at the christening. It’s pretty good reasoning either way.
