In typical celebrity fashion, Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz named their baby something ridiculous. According to
TMZ:
Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz had their kid yesterday (well done, blah blah blah), but couldn't resist the temptation to give their new son a name that will make him either very cool or most likely deeply resentful for a long time. That is, Bronx Mowgli -– as in asphalt jungle and Jungle Book.
Seriously, Bronx Mowgli? Does it have a last name, or is Mowgli the last name? What an f'd up family. If I'm ever famous like Joe the Plumber and then have a baby, I'm naming it Backfat McTurtle. Just you watch.
We all get to enjoy eating turkey on Thanksgiving because weird people like this guy in the background slaughter them by the dozens. So that isn't the issue here. And the election is all over with, so what Sarah Palin is talking about isn't the issue here either. What is the issue is the hilariousness of absolutely everything about this video. Can't really put it into words, so just watch. Unless you're a vegetarian, in which case go eat a carrot while the rest of us watch.
Seriously, Kate Beckinsale could go in public wearing a smurf costume and still be the hottest person in 300 miles. She sweats awesomeness and I would literally give my elbows to touch her shoulder. She could even be wearing shoulder pads when I do it, I don't care. That might sound pathetic, but when I'm on disability for my elbow loss and I know I touched Kate Beckinsale, you'll be the one slaving at a cheese factory wishing you'd thought of it first.
If Anne Hatheway and Natalie Portman got freaky and had a baby, not only would science be baffled, but that baby would grow up to be Kelly Brook. Maybe you don't see it, but I do and what I see matters because I'm writing this stupid post right now in my underwear.
Kelly is promoting her new fragrance although I'm not sure how photos promote a fragrance. It's not like they're scratch n sniff digital images. She should personally go door to door wearing the perfume, letting us have sex with her while we smell it. Otherwise, good luck selling that crap.
I don't know if it's the hat or the color of her skin, but Jessica Biel just really reminds me of Michael Jackson in these pictures. If there were 4 or 5 little boys around her in a circle, there would be no difference. Instead, we have what appears to be a cocaine deal going down with a hockey mom. The photog would've turned these into police if he didn't realize taking pictures of famous people all day is slightly worse than snorting a line.
Oh, and just so you know, it's not really a cocaine deal. Don't sue me, Jessica. I loved you in London. But in Summer Catch and the rest of your movies, not so much.
Now that Paris Hilton and Benji Madden are broken up, Paris can get back to doing what she does best. Guys. I signed up several months ago, but it could still be a couple of years til I get to go in Paris. It's a busy city afterall.
Here's Paris doing something at some place with some other people.
Jennifer Garner has filed a restraining order against some douchebag who's been stalking her for the last 6+ years. That's long enough that you can safely consider it a relationship. According to
Star:
In papers filed in Los Angeles Superior Court on Nov. 7, the mom-to-be asks for protection against Steven R. Burky, 36, who she alleges has "engaged in obsessive and harassing behavior, posting about me on the Internet, sending me multiple packages and letters containing delusional and paranoid thoughts and following me around the country, through multiple states, to make contact with me."
Jennifer's sworn affidavit states that Burky has shown up at her private residence — where she lives with hubby Ben Affleck and their 2-year-old, Violet — and said that "God sent him a vision" that the actress would be persecuted in a way that could result in her death.
The temporary order stipulates that Burky can't contact Jen by any means and must stay 100 yards away from her, Ben, Violet and several of their employees. It also specifically requests that he must stay away from Violet's school.
I once had a vision that Kristen Bell and I should have insane sex in a park bathroom, but 5 minutes later, I cleaned up the mess and went on with my life. What I didn't do was everything that this Steven R. Burky guy did. Ben Affleck really should kick the hell out of this guy if he comes around again. I've seen him in Pearl Harbor, that guy can fight.
Seriously though, stalking isn't cool. Hopefully this creep stays away from them or just dies.
