Britney Passes Drug Test, Gives Celebratory Crotch Flash

Well, it seems that Britney learned to do something right. Sources confirmed yesterday that Britney has passed a court-ordered drug test. TMZ says:

"It was part of the court order requiring Britney to undergo testing. Sources say contrary to what they call "public perception," Britney has accepted the terms laid down by L.A. Court Commissioner Scott Gordon."

TMZ further reports:

"Britney is currently with her children and a parenting coach and all is going fine. She has visitation from morning till early evening. Spears also had similar visitation yesterday and last Saturday, and she has accepted the fact that the parenting coach, Lisa Hacker, will be watching and making suggestions."

Man, I wish I were Britney. Being a normal person sucks. I could run a marathon, find a cure for cancer, and win a nobel peace prize and maybe, just maybe, my name would be mentioned on CNN.

Britney pees in a little plastic cup and the whole world rejoices. Then they go on the internet to look at pictures of her crotch. I don't see people looking up pictures of Ghandi's crotch. Not only was he the pioneer of non-violent social resistance, he was handsome. The Mahatma needs love too, dammit.

In the meantime, check out Britney showing the world a celebratory flash of her panties for passing her drug test. Enjoy, kids.