Doctors have given answers to a question that the world thought may never be revealed: Why is Britney Spears a fat pig?
Star Magazine reports:
And here's where it gets really gross. Star says:
So there you have it... nothing gets Britney Spears going quite like a Nacho Cheese Chalupa followed by a Caramel Frappachino to wash down some low-quality ground beef and a nice industrial-strength laxative.
Remember how I said that every time I see her fat ass, I smell pork? Yea, well after reading her love for greasy foods and laxatives, just looking at her makes me smell something a whole lot worse. I can't even describe the smell it creates in mind...
Try to imagine Porky Pig being cut up one of those wooden boards they use to gut fish out on the docks... now add some melted cheddar on top and you might start getting close to what my synesthesia makes me smell when I see that pig oinking around in public all day.
Forget a parenting coach, Britney needs a farmer to look after her. Maybe then she'll finally be thrown in a barn so she can roll around in the mud with all the other hogs.
Until then, it looks like her little hog hooves will be trampling over anything that's been left pure in our world. Damn celebrities, they always get what they want, don't they?
