My theory that Paula Abdul would be giving people their ice cream on roller skates soon just isn't panning out at all. She's already close to getting a new deal according to TMZ:
We're told Stevie M. wants Paula to be a contestant on "Dancing With the Stars" in the worst way. We're told there was talk of making her a guest judge but that's not gonna happen, and we know why. Paula and Carrie Ann Inaba don't get along.
It really makes no sense to me, but I guess this is why I'm writing for a Web site that gets 12 visitors a year if you don't count my family, 6 if you don't count Nigerian spammers. The good news is, I never ever watch Dancing with the Stars, so at least Paula will be gone from my life, and that's really all that matters.