It's times like this that I wish my dad was an oil tycoon or at least something more than a burger king fry cook because, if I had tons of money, I could actually meet Scarlett Johansson. People explains:
Johansson is auctioning off for charity two movie premiere tickets, as well as a meet-and-greet with the Golden Globe nominee herself.
The auction begins Thursday at 10 p.m. ET at eBay.com/Oxfam and will run through Sept. 24, with 100 percent of the proceeds benefiting Oxfam America, an organization long dedicated to finding lasting solutions to poverty, hunger, and social injustice around the world.
I'm going to sell off everything I own in hopes of winning these tickets. It'll be more of a Meet and Grab than a Meet and Greet if I win, so someone might want to warn Scarlett. I can't be controlled in the presence of women, which is why this basement only has a lock on the outside. Someone help :(