Last week, we learned that the butter and fat-crazed chef Paula Deen has diabetes (shocker). Now, Anthony Bourdain (possibly one of the coolest people alive and the host of the best travel and food shows) is accusing Paula Deen of poisoning Americans with her extremely unhealthy food, only to profit off of their illness now that she reveals she has diabetes.
On Twitter (apparently the best place to call out other celebrities) Bourdain wrote, "Thinking of getting into the leg-breaking business, so I can profitably sell crutches later."
Paula Deen basically built her empire off her high-fat, high-sugar recipes, which probably gave lots and lots of people diabetes. She then announced she has diabetes and she ALSO revealed she's become a paid spokeswoman for a diabetes medication. There are reports and rumors that Deen knew about her diabetes for years, but continued to hock her recipes on her Food Network cooking show, while secretly negotiating the endorsement deal.
My, my, my. The person who is going to take down the United States from the inside is a fat, female chef with diabetes from the South. I'm not sure anyone saw that one coming.
It's a good thing that Lindsay finally took care of her meth mouth and drug-related skin lesions. If she didn't, she wouldn't have been brave enough to crash the Weinstein Company Golden Globes pre-party at Chateau Marmont. Which she totally did:
An insider says Lohan snuck in via the hotel's back entrance. She then "made her way to the entrance for photo ops."
At least we won't have to be embarrassed for Lindsay much longer. She is bound to die in 5-10 years.
I'm just going to come right out and say it: if you're a man and you are in any way attracted to Cameron Diaz, you are a homosexual. I'm not joking. I am literally saying that she is a gay man litmus test. If you're on the fence and you're not quite sure which team you're batting for, just look at pictures of Cameron Diaz. If you think anything but "Jesus she needs a burka." or "If any more magazines say she is attractive I'm going to make a brain slushie." then you are gay. You're welcome. I just saved you thousands of dollars in therapist fees.
Sigh, celebrities always get preferential treatment. Bruno Mars will have a clear criminal record when the judge in his cocaine possession case will officially dismiss the charge this week. Bruno Mars was officially arrested in Las Vegas in September, 2010 at the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino whenever a bathroom attendant caught him doing coke and reported him to the authorities. (And I thought everyone would be cool in Vegas.)
Bruno pled guilty, but the judge deferred the matter instead of making him pay for it and gave Bruno a year to complete 200 hours of community service and attend drug education classes. He jumped through all of the judge's hoops (unlike some other Lindsay Lohan-esque celebrities) so he the charges will be dismissed.
Aside from being dumb enough to get caught doing cocaine in the Hard Rock restroom, Bruno Mars is pretty smart.
Kim Kardashian didn't let Rickey Gervais comment about her being drunk and trashy get her down... in fact, she pulled herself up by her spanx and got dressed in her best attire and went downtown. ... apparently, "Early 80s Mom" is the look to have right now. Sexxxxxy?
Bone Thugs-n-Harmony is now getting sued by a woman who claims she is permanently scarred from one of their performances. And she was being literal, because she got smacked in the face by a swinging mic. The woman says she was hanging out near the front of the stage at a Bone Thugs show in Missouri in 2010 when Layzie Bone began to swing the mic in the air.
According to the lawsuit, he "lost control of the microphone, launching it into the crowd" and striking the woman right in the head. She claims she suffered bruises, contusions and severe lacerations to her head which left permanent scars. She also claims she became sick, sore, lame and disordered as a result. (It sounds like she needs to be smacked again.) She wants more than $25,000 for getting hit in the face with a mic.
This is exactly why we suck as a species. Good people would feel flattered by getting hit in the face at a Bone Thugs concert.
Ricky Gervais hosted the 2012 Golden Globe awards last night. He didn't say anything too outrageous... aside from basically outing Jodie Foster on live television by calling her a lesbian.
In his opening monologue, Ricky said he had been forbidden from discussing anything related to Gibson, including his recent flick, "The Beaver" that was directed by Jodie Foster. He then joked about "Jodie Foster's 'Beaver'" ... saying, "I haven't seen it myself. I've spoken to a lot of guys here, they haven't seen it either. That doesn't mean it's not any good." Ahhhh, class. He has it. Thank God they finally starting choosing entertaining (who tear down celebrities) to host these events. Oh, and the winners, if you care:
(Holy sh*t, Matt LeBlanc won an award? ... he is still working?)
TV Series, Drama
American Horror Story
Boardwalk Empire
Boss
Game of Thrones Homeland
Actor In A TV Series, Drama
Steve Buscemi, Boardwalk Empire
Bryan Cranston, Breaking Bad Kelsey Grammar, Boss
Jeremy Irons, The Borgias
Damian Lewis, Homeland
Actress In A TV Series, Drama
Claire Danes, Homeland
Mireille Enos, The Killing
Julianna Margulies, The Good Wife
Madeleine Stowe, Revenge
Callie Thorne, Necessary Roughness
TV Series, Comedy
New Girl
Enlightened
Episodes
Glee Modern Family
Actor In A TV Series, Comedy
Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock
David Duchovny, Californication
Johnny Galecki, The Big Bang Theory
Thomas Jane, Hung Matt LeBlanc, Episodes
Actress In A TV Series, Comedy
Tina Fey, 30 Rock
Amy Poehler, Parks and Recreation Laura Dern, Enlightened
Zooey Deschanel, New Girl
Laura Linney, The Big C
Best Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for TV
Cinema Verite Downton Abbey
The Hour
Mildred Pierce
Too Big to Fail
Best Performance by an Actor in a Mini-Series or a Motion Picture Made for TV
Hugh Bonneville, Downton Abbey Idris Elba, Luther
William Hurt, Too Big to Fail
Bill Nighy, Page Eight
Dominic West, The Hour
Best Performance by an Actress in a Mini-Series or a Motion Picture Made for TV
Romola Garai, The Hour
Diane Lane, Cinema Verite
Elizabeth McGovern, Downton Abbey
Emily Watson, Appropriate Adult Kate Winslet, Mildred Pierce
Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role in a Series, Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for TV
Peter Dinklage, Game of Thrones
Paul Giamatti, Too Big to Fail
Guy Pearce, Mildred Pierce
Tim Robbins, Cinema Verite
Eric Stonestreet, Modern Family
Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role in a Series, Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for TV
Jessica Lange, American Horror Story
Kelly Macdonald, Boardwalk Empire
Maggie Smith, Downton Abbey
Sofía Vergara, Modern Family
Evan Rachel Wood, Mildred Pierce
Motion Picture, Drama
The Descendants
The Help
Hugo
The Ides Of March
Moneyball
Warhorse
Actor In A Motion Picture, Drama
George Clooney, The Descendants
Leonardo DiCaprio, J. Edgar
Michael Fassbender, Shame
Ryan Gosling, The Ides Of March
Brad Pitt, Moneyball
Actress In A Motion Picture, Drama
Viola Davis, The Help Meryl Streep, The Iron Lady
Tilda Swinton, We Need To Talk About Kevin
Rooney Mara, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
Glenn Close, Albert Nobbs
Motion Picture, Comedy
50/50 The Artist
Bridesmaids
Midnight In Paris
My Week With Marilyn
Actor In A Motion Picture, Comedy
Jean Dujardin, The Artist
Brendan Gleeson, The Guard
Owen Wilson, Midnight In Paris
Joseph Gordon-Levitt, 50/50
Ryan Gosling, Crazy, Stupid, Love
Actress In A Motion Picture, Comedy
Michelle Williams, My Week With Marilyn
Jodie Foster, Carnage
Kristen Wiig, Bridesmaids
Charlize Theron, Young Adult
Kate Winslet, Carnage
Supporting Actor In A Motion Picture
Albert Brooks, Drive Christopher Plummer, Beginners
Kenneth Branagh, My Week With Marilyn
Jonah Hill, Moneyball
Viggo Mortensen, A Dangerous Method
Supporting Actress In A Motion Picture
Berenice Bejo, The Artist Octavia Spencer, The Help
Jessica Chastain, The Help
Janet McTeer, Albert Nobbs
Shailene Woodley, The Descendants
Best Director
Martin Scorcese, Hugo
George Clooney, The Ides of March
Michel Hazanvicius, The Artist
Alexander Payne, The Descendants
Woody Allen, Midnight In Paris