Jordan Carver and a Fake Johnny Depp. Just Because.

The older and more depressed I get, the less I care about silly things like "details," "facts," or "health insurance." So when I look at these pictures of a Johnny Depp lookalike and Jordan Carver, I make up my own story in my head. Here it is, accept as truth, and don't you dare fact check:

After breaking up with his model girlfriend, Johnny Depp sought solace between Jordan Carver's enormous breasts. He didn't quite feel like himself, but that didn't stop him from sexing up the slutty girl for a week straight. He is now SINGLE AND READY TO MINGLE.