Lindsay Lohan has been in Capri, Italy for a film festival over the past few days and it has certainly added some sparks to her love life! And by sparks I clearly mean that she's begun to contaminate the purity of Europe with her Hollywood skank characteristics. The UK's Daily Mail reports:
Dammit! That could have been me. I mean, I'm a strapping young Italian man with irresistible sex-appeal. Seriously. I have the same kind of style as this Dario character. I've got the same hair, and I talk in broken English very quickly in a stammering, choppy manner as I try to pronounce the word "beautiful" but then immediately give up and just start calling every American woman I see "Bella." The moment I do that, all the ladies' panties slip off as if there had melted butter on their hips!!! What? You never heard that butter comparison before? Hmm... that's funny... I always thought it was universal. I guess I was mistaken. Clearly, only sexy Italian guys like me say things like that.
Nevertheless, let's not get too swept away here. This Dario guy wasn't around for long. Rather, Lindsay was moving on to her next Italian boy faster than she could say "Ciao" to Dario. The Daily Mail further reports:
Mmmmm.... Lindsay in a silver mini-dress. Like a piece of delicious meat wrapped in tin-foil. The only problem is, in Lindsay's case, the meat may or may not be contaminated with several never-before-seen strands of various known and unknown STDs. But hey, it's still meat, isn't it? ZING!
Anyway, here's evidence of Lindsay bringing her trampiness overseas. Enjoy what I've done for you here.
