Christina Aguilera

The latest news and gossip involving celebrity Christina Aguilera.

Christina Aguilera Ate Too Much Turkey. And Human Babies.

This might have technically happened before Thanksgiving this year... but I\'m still left assuming that Christina Aguilera made her ass this big by eating several, full-grown turkeys. I\'m not even mad. I\'m impressed. ... [Full Story]

Christina Aguilera Should Reconsider Her Wardrobe Choices

I\'m not going to make fun of Christina Aguilera for gaining weight. From time to time, all of our bodies\' change in a way where we might not be too happy with it. BUT, with that being said, don\'t wear EXTREMELY TIGHT AND UNFLATTERING clothes if you don\'t have the body for it. Class it up! Adele is a big girl but you don\'t see the internet hating on her for wearing a flattering, black dress ... [Full Story]

Christina Aguilera is Overly Confident

No one should ever feel like less of a person for being overweight. However, if you do happen to be overweight, you shouldn\'t necessarily flaunt your body like you weigh 105lbs. Take Christina Aguilera for example. She was in Beverly Hills recently at the 40th American Music Awards wearing a purple spandex (?) dress and what appears to be a feather boa. These things make no sense together. ... [Full Story]

Anorexia Agrees with Christina.

Christina Aguilera was getting chunkariffic to the point of demanding that \"The Voice\" crew only shoot her from flattering angles and wearing hats the size of St. Bernard puppies on her head to distract the audience from her back fat. However, in recent pictures with her boyfriend Matthew Rutler, she has been looking much skinnier (\"less fat\" would be more accurate). Congratulations, Xtina! ... [Full Story]

Christina Aguilera - The Queen of Camera Tricks.

If you have been watching \"The Voice,\" you have been thinking the very same things I have been thinking: 1.) I\'m unnaturally attracted to Adam Levine. 2.) Why does Cee Lo Green rape all of the contestants? 3.) God, my life has come to this? 4.) Oh hey, Christina doesn\'t look that fat. Also, boobs. But don\'t let Xtina fool you! Apparently, she is as ... voluptuous ... as ever ... [Full Story]

Christina Aguilera Sang Until She Bled. Guess How.

Christina Aguilera showed her respect for Etta James by singing at her funeral over the weekend. Unfortunately, she put so much feeling into the piece she was belting out, that something that looked suspiciously like blood started dripping down her leg. Her reps claim that it was self tanner that was hidden in her naughty bits, but I have a hard time believing that wet self tanner would ... [Full Story]

Christina Aguilera Looked Like This

So. Well. My oh my. Christina Aguilera performed at the Michael Jackson tribute concert in Wales on Saturday. She looked like this. ... now, she isn\'t fat. But she definitely shouldn\'t be wearing this. This is a sad, sad day for my penis. ... [Full Story]

Christina Aguilera is a Raging Drunk

Christina Aguilera will never learn her lesson. Shortly after being arrested for public intoxication and being ugly [citation needed] she ... went right back to drinking. Us Weekly says: \"on March 4, three days after a wine-drenched feast at Osteria Mozza led to her public intoxication bust, Aguilera and her beau Matthew Rutler returned. On their menu that night? Two bottles of wine and ... [Full Story]

So Christina is Crazy?

So here is a quick story: within the past year, Christina Aguilera split up with her husband of 9+ years. Then she sucked hard at the Super Bowl and completely spaced on the words. At some point, she got so depressed that she crashed Jeremy Renner\'s birthday party, where she got drunk and passed out on his bed. (Fun fact: she never met Jeremy Renner before that night.) Recently: ...her ... [Full Story]

Christina is Sorry and Stuff

Sports leagues really need to stop hiring celebrities to sing the national anthem - because they always mess that sh*t up. ALWAYS!!!1!1 The National Anthem is one of those national anthems that you hear since your childhood in the country that it was the anthem was of. You know, an anthem being the main song for your home, i.e., the national anthem. Christina didn\'t exactly show regret for ... [Full Story]

Everyone Should Get Pregnant. Everyone.

Do you SEE what happens when girls let down their guard and actually get knocked up? A MIRACLE. There is a 1 to 2 month period where chicks get extremely hot when they\'re pregnant. Only about 15% STAY hot, but when they\'re in the stage Xtina is in... it\'s all glow and beauty. So thanks, whoever you are, for knocking up Christina. :) ... [Full Story]

Christina Got HACKED

The (sort of) nude photos of Christina Aguilera were circulating the Internet this week were apparently \"illegally obtained by a hacker.\" This hacker obtained the photos allegedly from Christina\'s stylist ... and this is according to the singer\'s rep. In the pictures, Aguilera was wearing nothing but pasties and a few strands of fabric. They were \"taken in the privacy of Ms. Aguilera\'s ... [Full Story]