Eva Longoria

The latest news and gossip involving celebrity Eva Longoria.

The Divorce - A Long Time Coming

Oh, these stupid divorce stories. This is the worst kind of gossip, since it happens all of the time in real life. The only redeeming quality that this post has is my hilariously successful title pun. But, let\'s get on with it. Apparently, the divorce between Eva Longoria and Tony Parker was in the works for at least a week before Eva filed. But it wasn\'t for the supposed infidelity: Tony ... [Full Story]

Eva Longoria & Tony Parker Are Not Divorcing

THANK GOD... it looks like Eva Longoria and Tony Parker are not getting a divorce. Whew. For a second, I thought every man and lesbian in the free world was going to go crazy with lust. TMZ reported that Tony had filed for divorce. Two clerks at the Bexar County Courthouse in Texas had told us the case was filed and sealed by a family law judge. But Eva\'s rep said that Tony did not ... [Full Story]

Eva Longoria at the Knicks Game

Here\'s Eva Longoria at the New York Knicks game yesterday, watching them play against her husband\'s team, the Spurs. The Spurs won, so it was a happy time in the Longoria-Parker household last night. Now I\'m going to go imagine that I\'m an NBA star married to an attractive woman, and then possibly kill myself when it sinks in that I\'m not. Have a good day. ... [Full Story]

Kate Beckinsale and Eva Longoria Together At Last

Kate Beckinsale and Eva Longoria were seen together, leaving the X1V Restaurant in Los Angeles last night. You probably know that I think Eva is more annoying than that kid that screams at the top of his lungs in a restaurant while his parents say things like \"if you don\'t be quiet, that man over there is gonna get you!\", but Kate manages to make her tolerable. So all is forgiven. Enjoy your ... [Full Story]

Eva Longoria isn\'t Bad

Usually, just hearing Eva Longoria\'s voice is enough to send me diving under my bed, shaking uncontrollably. She\'s probably the most overrated girl in the world, but in these pictures, she redeems herself slightly. Of course some of that is because I can\'t hear her. So maybe we could be together after all if she loses her vocal cords or I go deaf. A boy can dream. ... [Full Story]

Eva Longoria Rallies for Cancer

Is it just me or is calling an event \"Rally for Kids with Cancer\" kinda morbid? I don\'t think cancer needs any kind of rally, it seems to be doing pretty well on its own. But anyway, it\'s only appropriate that Eva Longoria\'s ugliness was there. I\'ll never understand the fascination with her, and I\'d also like to know why Tony Parker isn\'t somewhere crying after getting molested up and ... [Full Story]

Latina Celebrities That Will Blow You (Away)

Hola, me gusta these hot chicks. My Spanish sucks, but these celebrities would fit right in in Mexico City. Or Barcelona. Or Los Angeles. Dania Ramirez, J-Lo, Salma Hayek\'s big boobies, and more are all here in this conglomerate of Latina beauty. Enjoy, maybe while eating a taco. Wait, is that racist? ... [Full Story]

How\'s Your Knowledge of Celebrity Racks, Part 2

In case you missed the first one, click here to see it. Because I\'m a pervert who loves celebrities, especially of the female variety, I put together a second edition of Celebrity Racks for your viewing pleasure. So take a guess who it is and then click the thumbnail to see the high resolution, full version to find out. It\'s almost as fun as pushing the handicapped into traffic. ... [Full Story]

Eva Longoria is a Little Bit Maniacal

Seen here at the screening for \"Phoebe in Wonderland\" in Beverly Hills, Eva Longoria looks a little bit like she lost her medication. It\'s no wonder Tony Parker plays basketball so much, he\'s clearly just trying to get away from this woman. Might have something to do with his contract and money and being in the NBA, too, but don\'t quote me on that. You can, however, quote me at parties and ... [Full Story]

Mario Lopez is Embarrassed

I take back every single fantasy I\'ve ever had about Eva Longoria. I would rather have sex with Tony Parker\'s jock strap. This is disturbing. It\'s not so much that she looks like an ugly tramp that bothers me, but it\'s that she and her make-up artists and magazine editors and everyone else on the planet put all of this effort into tricking us into masturbating to Eva Longoria, and then ... [Full Story]

Eva Longoria: Not a Baby, Just a Lot of Food

If you thought Eva Longoria was pregnant, you were wrong and you should stop speculating. Geez. Seriously, she\'s just fat. USMag: \"I\'m just fat,\" she said Tuesday during an interview with Le Grand Journal with husband Tony Parker. She then burst out laughing while Parker chuckled nervously. On the upcoming season of Desperate Housewives, her character will turn into an exhausted ... [Full Story]

Eva Longoria Needs Rest, Sits on a Fire Hydrant!

We all know that Eva Longoria is known for being a beautiful, classy girl. However, I'm not so sure that Eva lived up to those traits when she put on the tightest white pants in the world yesterday and then sat on the top of a fire hydrant! There's just something unnatural about these pictures. She looks like she's in such an awkward position... it's just painful to watch! On the other hand ... [Full Story]